The F Word I Don’t Want to Teach My Daughter
Fear is the thing that will serve her the LEAST and rob her the MOST. I would like her to Notorious RBG the HECK out of life. For me, personally, fear and I are consciously parting ways. My senior year of college was plagued with constant panic attacks. It was an eye opener to what exactly was running my world. Fear. I have worked hard on myself, and continue to do so; and I can honestly say now that Fear and I don’t really talk regularly anymore. But, as a parent, especially in today’s world (WebMD Yo!) I know that it is pretty easy to tell your trust to take a hike and let fear play a few innings.
I don’t want that to be how I show up for my daughter.
I want my daughter to try new things, be creative, be daring, be confident. I want to be mindful of what and how I speak to her. She doesn’t NEED to “be careful”. I’m not saying I don’t watch her or give her a helping hand. But when I see her going to do something new or bold, I stop myself. I stop myself because sometimes I feel like as a girl you are told to “be careful” A LOT. What does this mean though? If you hear it constantly is it the same thing as hearing “think of all the things you should FEAR before you do that”?
Instead of “being careful”, “be observant”, “be aware”, “look for a solution”, “I’m here if you need me”. In life I feel like the greatest and most rewarding experiences come when you trust in yourself, you work hard, you observe, and you GO FOR IT!
Instead of “be careful what you say.” How about “be AWARE your words have POWER”.
I want her to know that. Her words have power. Her words carry weight in the world. How she chooses to talk about herself and to others is who she becomes. Don’t FEAR who you are, or who you WANT to be. When you’re true to yourself trust that the right people and experiences will find you and you them.
I want her to know that the word “NO” isn’t a bad word. It’s a BOUNDARIES BUILDER. She has boundaries people need to respect, and she theirs. Boundaries are healthy. Don’t be afraid to set them, and stand by them, and re-set them again. If someone is asking you to change your boundaries for them, they may not be what or who you need.
I want her to know that anger and fear are one in the same. They feed on each other. Focus on the changes and contributions YOU can make. Focus on where your talents and passions can serve others. You are the only one who can control how you feel, and where it takes you. Don’t FEAR taking control.
I want to give her a strong support system. I want her to believe in herself and in something greater. She’s never alone, and she has love and strength to pull from whenever she needs it, anywhere she needs it. It’s all present all the time.
I want to teach my daughter a very important F Word, and I hope she drops it as often as she can. FAITH.